Lyrics

don't go to reno and do something you regret
don't go to reno and place an awful bet
don't go to reno--you'll end up just like me
don't go to reno--you can't afford the fee

i'm a bitter, dumb chump--i live in a dump
i haven't got a pot to poop in
kept fritterin' away all my hard earned pay
my old lady, she got to snooping
now i'm a bitter, dumb chump
my nuts have a lump
and it rains wherever i go
i had a wife and some kids but now we're on the skids
i'm 'fraid i'm all on my own

don't go to reno--those dealers don't give two shits
don't go to reno--don't motorboat no tits
don't go to reno--don't matter who's givin' ya head
don't go to reno--you'll burn up all yer bread

now i'm hungry and stuck and down on my luck
i can't find a lick of food
i was high on the hog--even had me a dog
but now i can't say he's no good (he was delicious)
i'm hungry, im stuck and i can't start my truck
i'm boutta die from lack of fuel
i had a wife and some kids but now we're on the skids
cuz i broke the cardinal rule

don't go to reno and get caught with hookers and blow
don't go to reno and pawn yer wife's fur coat
don't go to reno and get high on PCP
don't go to reno and bring home an STD

i'm horny as hell, i must've lost my smell
cuz i can't catch a whiff of tang
i used to come on in with a song and a grin
me and the little girlies'd bang
now i'm horny as hell and i'm starting to swell
my balls are so blue they're black
i had a wife and some kids but now we're on the skids
i'm too far gone to turn back